Fine! I’ll do it myself. Fine! I don’t need you. Fine! Have it your way. Fine!
I can’t count the number of times these words have come out of my mouth (or hung out in my thoughts) when I didn’t get the response I wanted when I wanted it.
Growing up, anger was treated with contempt. It was ugly. It was bad. To be avoided at all costs. Rename it. Stuff it. Box it up and loose it. NOW!
Not allowed to be angry, I directed any anger I experienced at myself. Or felt so guilty for being angry I would punish myself.
I still tend toward these actions.
But anger happens. Ignoring it won’t make it go away. Stuffing it doesn’t mean nothing happened.
The other side of the don’t-get-angry coin, exploding, isn’t the answer either.
Anger must be dealt with. You can stuff, stuff, stuff then let it explode or you can control its release in a healthy way. For the purpose of rebuilding and righting wrongs.
I now have children and I tell them: When you’re angry (not if), do not damage people – including yourself (physically or emotionally) or property.
Good advice for myself. When I am sane enough to follow that advice (I fail miserably at times), there are several antidotes for the anger threatening at my door. These actions may not make the anger disappear completely, but they can lessen the intensity and pave the way toward rebuilding and righting wrongs.
· Work out. Physical exercise lessens the stress hormones
released in your body.
released in your body.
· Confront in love when confrontation is necessary.
· Return kindness for offense.
· Chose acceptance and compassion for another’s journey.
· Wait before taking action against offense. Cool off.
· Forgive. Easily. Quickly. Thouroughly.
· Prayer.
Do you have an antidote for anger in your life?
What helps you to handle the situation with grace?
Book recommendation: Unglued by Lysa Terkeurst
Photo credit: www.freedigitalphotos.net //Stuart Miles
Great post, Angela – the importance of owning our anger and safely expressing it.