For a few weeks on Monday Musings, we’re looking at principles found in the 10 commandments that can be applied to guarding intimacy with our spouse. Not legalistic, binding laws, but principles that can guide us in our decisions.
“You shall not misuse the name of the LORD your God…” Exodus 20:7
If this principle was directed at marriages, I’m thinking it would sound like this: “Do not speak ill of one another.”
Raise your hand if you have ever shared something negative about your spouse under the disguise of humor.
It is far too easy to talk about our frustrations with our spouse under the cover of humor. In reality, it’s no joke, only a search for our own validation that we were in the right.
And what about those posts on FB or some other social media that tells all about that mistake our husband make and how angry it makes us. We’re just sharing our feelings, right?
In the process of trying to make ourselves feel better, we are destroying their reputation, dishonoring the man we call husband.
No matter how we couch it, if we’re airing in public anything negative our spouse did, this is not a “please pray for me and my part in this mess” cry, but a down and out on our spouse.
Airing frustrations and irritations can take normal conflict and turn it into a wedge.Whether in their presence or not, whether in jest or seriousness, speaking ill of our spouse lessens our respect for them which lowers the trust level. As the trust factor goes down, so does our potential for intimacy.
Speak well or speak nothing. Deal with our frustrations first in our own heart, then directly with our spouse.
Have you been airing your marital differences
in front of a panel of witnesses?
in front of a panel of witnesses?
Do you need to change how you go about handling
your frustrations with your spouse?
If you are having real issues in your marriage, please, do get help. Make sure your motive for sharing and asking advice is pure, with a heart to change your part.
your frustrations with your spouse?